Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Alphabe~Thursday "U" is for Uxoricide

Crazy letter...crazy week!

Yes folks I am headed for a melt down and it is going to get UGLY!

I am like that little tea kettle that is boiling and boiling just waiting to blow it's whistle, and when I open my mouth somebody is going to see my Uvula!

In less than 30 days I have seen 8 doctors in 8 visits in the same office and I am out of pocket $340.00 in co-pays. Seems everybody is a specialist these days, and this will be the cause of my Undoing.

What ever happened to one visit, ongoing treatment, and paying just one co-pay?? Somebody’s fixin’ to get an Ultimatum.

I am so tired that when a cashier asked me today if I get a senior discount I said “Hell Yes! Bring It!” …Even though I am not quite there yet, you better give me the damn discount just for Upsetting me by asking me such a stupid question like that! ....Can’t you see I don’t look a day Under….ummm no over 40! Yeah, 40!

My tension is mounting; to cross me right now would be Unwise!

My husband is walking on eggshells, one word he has not Uttered.

He watches an awful lot of True Crime and Unsolved Murder shows.

I think he is planning to commit Uxoricide.

I hope it’s gonna be swift. It would be swift if he owned an Uzi, but maybe a little too loud don't you think??

At the rate I am racking up out of pocket co-pays, it's looking more like cremation than services with the Undertaker.

And when I am gone, my dear husband will let his sisters, in all their Uppityness, rifle through my Underwear drawer and have a gay old time running my delicate granny panties up the flag pole down at the empty U.S. Post Office building!

I am going to take two Ultram and go to bed now.

Thanks for listening!

Whew, that felt good to get that off my chest! I needed a shoulder to Unleash my frustrations on. Don’t forget to stop by Jenny Matlock’s blog (off on my tangent) and check out other crazy stories by clicking here:

Thanks for stopping by!~Ames


Judie said...

WOW! And I thought my rant about getting a traffic ticket was over the top! You had better send me an email, sister, and tell me about all those doctors!! I mean it!!

Viki said...

LOL, too cute and very clever. Ha, ha.

beckyp said...

sorry to hear about all your doctor visits Hope they figure out what is wrong soon... On a side note I have to see the dentist 4 times in the next month. I have to have a deep cleaning done. Had the first today. I also have to get a cavity filled I don't like the dentist. (I can relate to the copays)

EG Wow said...

Oh my goodness! :))

Vicki/Jake said...

I'd LOL if it wasn't so dang funny....?? HAHA oops. Sorry for all your medical Uncertainties. At least your humor is still intact:) Get well soon..

Jo said...

omg that was hysterically good ... sorry for all of your problems but i thank you for sharing them with us in such a funny way ... boy i dont think i could ever afford to live in the usa with all of those co-pays ... i'm too used to the totally free.

Kathy Felsted Usher said...

Thanks for teaching me a new word "uxorcide". I think I won't share this one with my hubby!! LOL

Anonymous said...

How frustrating! Hope they figure it out soon, or I think you're entitled to rifle through their drawers and hoist their underwear up the flag pole! =>

Gattina said...

I hurry over to buy this urn on sale hahahaha !

CollectIn Texas Gal said...


Nonna Beach said...

Ames, LOL that was so awesome...I'm gonna remember this for a long time, especially while playing Scrabble but on a serious note, I'm worried about you ! What's up ?

And YES, take that Senior discount even if you don't look it !!!

Sarah~Magnolia Surprise said...

Oh that was hysterical! Love the pic of the youngster in the tiara!!! Had to google Uxoricide -- now I'll be listening for my hubby to be uttering it under his breath..... ha!

Rocky Mountain Woman said...

Wow...looks like you are off on your own tangent! Hope things settle down for you and you get feeling a little better.

What's going on with you anyway? How come your not feeling good? Should we be worried?



Lisa H. said...


I always love your posts. Thanks for teaching me a new word (Uxoricide) and making me laugh with the 'self portrait'.

Mary said...

Funny post...You really know your U's....

Pondside said...

You certainly covered U!!

Keri said...

Wow. I don't think I even know that many U words! I had a pretty good idea, but had to look up uxoricide. I hope you have a nicer weekend!

The Cello Strings said...

lovely ..kind of haunting images.

Jenny said...

Geez, Louise! I hope you feel a little better now!

I share your rage at medical costs...and stupid insurance and...


Never mind.

Would a big hug help?

Or another letter to write about, perhaps?

Thanks for linking up!

And thanks for the smile.