Saturday, August 27, 2011

Saturday Centus #69~ There was an old woman.....

Hi all, it’s Saturday again. Gosh the older I get the faster they roll around. The heat must really be getting to Jenny because she has thrown us a doozy (is that a real word??) this time with this prompt: “Surprise I’m Pregnant.” I shudder at the thought, once was enough for me!

My husband came from a family of twelve children and he had to do without a lot of things growing up that I always took for granted. He jokingly said that his mother would tie a string around a pork chop and each child had just a few seconds to gnaw on it before it got yanked away. Maybe that’s why he is such a big meat eater?

Can you imagine if there were no birth control? I just can’t imagine what it would be like to have so many children, all that noise and pooping going on. And then there’s the laundry, the cooking and cleaning. Oh Lord, that would drive me insane! That’s how I think the old lady in the shoe must have felt.

And now onto my contribution….



“Geez, how do you tone down those three little words?”

“How do you tell a man you’re pregnant again after you’ve already had eleven of his children?”

“Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the stupidest of them all?”

“Uh that would be you, fertile Myrtle.”

“Maybe he won’t notice.”

“Well you are kinda fat.”

“Hey, don’t be so mean!”
“Maybe he won’t notice one more; you know what they say, cheaper by the dozen.”
“We’re gonna need a bigger shoe!”
“A high top would be nice.”
“Better make another appointment with Dr. Scholl’s.”
“I’ve got to quit talking to myself.”


Don't forget to stop by Jenny Matlock's blog (off on my tangent) and see what's going on with this week's Centus. You can get there by clicking on this link:

Thanks for stopping by!~Ames


Sue said...


Cute, Ames!


Nonna Beach said...

Excellent and very creative Ames...loved it !!!

Judie said...

Better her than me, Ames! This is such a cute post! But enough is enough!!

beckyp said...

very cute I loved it Thanks for the laugh

Bookie said...

Wonderful take on what I think is a hard Centus! Does the hurricane make you extra creative??!?!

cj Schlottman said...

I agree with Bookie. This is a tricky prompt, and you turned it on his ear! Great Centus.


Gems said...

That was a fun read and very creative. I like the idea. Can you imagine 12 kids????? I have to move on...the thought is scaring me too much! :)

Gems xxx

Dazee Dreamer said...

Loved it. 12 kids. shudder. but alas, I came from a family of 9 kids, so I know the score.

jfb57 said...

Wonderful! I love the shoe analogy! Brill!

Fancy another 100 word challenge to have a go at?

Jo said...

loved the dialogue and the shoe analogy ... but 12 kids ... I guess this qualifies her for the "reality" show circuit

Porky said...

That works well - mention of the shoe means we think we've got the whole solved, but no; it may simply be the cacophany that brings on the character's speaking even when it's quiet. Very thought-provoking.

CollectIn Texas Gal said...

Well, TODAY, they aren't cheaper by the dozen. That goes for Kids and Eggs. When I say Jenny's PROMPT this AM, I knew you'd have a 'Doozy'! Yep, I like that word...real or not! said...

You are so funny, Ames. These are all great. I especially like the "mirror, mirror" and "fertile Myrtle" response. I can't imagine 12 kids. One would be enough for me too, if I had one.

Anonymous said...

Very creative. Great self dialogue. 12 childern is brave but what world they grow up in. My mom was one of 11 kids.

PⒿ @ $ € € ₦$ ₣®0₥... said...

This was very cute and knowing from whence your inspiration came....God Bless your mother-in-law!

Seriously, I see a pregnant woman and I get chills. Shhhh! It's true....but don't tell anyone!

upinthecosmos said...

LOL, great post... I talk to myself all the time & it sounds a lot like this... although I'm not talking about being pregnant. Love it:-)

rmannell said...

The poor woman who lived in a shoe, she had so many children she hoped her husband wouldn't notice one more. Still, providing they are cared for and loved, why not? :)

Sherry@Back2Vintage said...

So funny! It's a doozy!!! :)

Tina said...

cheaper by the dozen lol ... thats shoes gotta be a big one then!

laurie @ bargain hunting said...

That was fun! Your story was a riot, but I loved the story about your husband's family and the pork chop. You kept me laughing from beginning to end with this post. Thanks. laurie

Pondside said...

That was good!
My mum was one of 13 and I think her mum used the string-on-the-pork chop trick!

Jenny said...

Ames! I loved this! You totally rocked the dialogue. My Mom was one of twelve and this made me think again about how those actual conversations went - ha!

Thanks for the smile!

Anna said...

Dear Ames,
This is so cute! What imaginative story-telling!
I am beginning to feel like the old woman who lived in a shoe with five cats. (The little kits have grown up!) I keep thinking of your dog who had 21 pups! (I am counting my blessings!)

Thanks for visiting my post, which is actually two separate posts. Please visit 'Part Two' if you have the time.

Best wishes,
Anna's SC wk 69 'Surprise, I'm pregnant - Part One'
Anna's SC wk 69 'Surprise, I'm pregnant - Part Two'