Sunday, October 31, 2010

Saturday Centus #26 ~Vertically Challenged

I am participating in Jenny Matlock's Saturday Centus. This week she has thrown a wrench in the works by limiting the amount of words you can use to just 50. The prompt does not count for your 50 words AND it must be left intact in the body of your story. No illustrations are permitted and the story can be fact or fiction.

This week's prompt is in bold:  "Abraham Lincoln was a lot shorter than I thought he would be"

If you haven't already done this, stop by Jenny Matlock's blog and check out some funny stories here:

This was NOT as easy as I thought it would be.~Ames


Vertically Challenged

“You went out with a guy who looks like Abraham Lincoln? Regina questioned

“Yes well, Abraham Lincoln was a lot shorter than I thought he would be. He was more like a Danny Devito.” Ellen pouted.

“You’re only 5 foot tall Ellen, size is not everything”. Regina pointed out. “At least you’d still have someone to look up to.” (hee hee)

Friday, October 29, 2010

Thrifty Finds

I thought I'd participate in a Linky party called Junkin Finds hosted by Linda over at her A LA CARTE blog . You'll be amazed at some of the nice thrifty things that friends can find while out and about. You can check them out here:


My Thrifty Finds of the Week

This sweet little oil painting dated 1974. I love the transparency of the milk bottle.
This was a deal. A large bell jar for $5. It still had the Marshall's sticker on it. I'm still tweeking the display.

Milk glass. I was looking for a bowl to put my new beaded fruit in and
I also found the neat Banana bowl and votive candle holder too.
                               I found a whole bag full of these sweet little vintage Angels in Blue, Pink and Cream.
                                     Wouldn't these look adorable on a Christmas tree? The vintage cookie cutters too!

       Well that's it, until the next time anyway.
   Happy Hunting!~Ames

Here's a few of my finds from past thrift excursions:

Thursday, October 28, 2010

"F" is for Five and Dime

I am participating in Jenny Matlock's Alphabe~Thursday. This Thursday is about the letter "F".

Stop on by Jenny's blog and read some really good short stories about the letter "F" here:

The Five and Dime

When I was a little girl, one of four little girls in our family, our grandmother used to take us to a Five and Dime store called McCrory’s.  It wasn’t a large chain store like Wal-Mart; it had a limited supply of unusual, but inexpensive items by today’s standards.  

My grandmother,  mamaw  Lena,  would take us there to purchase Christmas presents for our parents, other grandparents and each other. The memories I have from shopping in the Five and Dime are happy ones. Some of the things we would buy for our parents and grandparents weren’t very expensive and are now obsolete, or hard to find,  and if you can still find them they are now expensive. I thought I would share a few with you.

Evening in Paris Eau de Toilette (

I always thought this was a funny name, “Toilette”, and my sister would always refer to it as toilet water. I actually thought that’s what it was for many years.

 Hankies (  
What little old woman didn’t carry one back then? We always bought hankies for our mamaw’s. They carried them pinned inside their bras with money inside of them for when they didn’t need purses. They pinned our milk money and church tithes inside of our dresses too. I can remember mamaw Lena pulling out money to buy a bottle of soda pop from the machine outside of the Five and Dime store. The four of us would share it. It was icy cold, sweet, made you burp, or it came out your nose.  The littlest usually got stuck with the last swig that nobody else seemed to want.

Nail kits ( 
Every Christmas we usually got one of these in our stocking. Along with a big fat shiny orange, a tooth brush, or hair brush and comb, a pair of gloves for church, or maybe some nail polish. There was always hard candy in the bottom of the stocking. The hard candy stuck to the stocking so it usually had red fur on it. We ate it anyway.

 Rain Bonnets, Scarves, Shower caps, Curlers. (  
Mom, and both our grandmother's always used these practical gifts. I can still remember carrying a plastic rain bonnet to Elementary school.


Shoes shine products, Shoe laces, shoe horns, Zippo lighters with flint packs, coin purses, back scratchers, collapsible medicine cups (, all were useful things back then that could be purchased inexpensively from the Five and Dime.

Carnival Glass, Milk glass, and Early American Press Cut glass. ( and Wikipedia/Manfred Hyde)
Carnival glass was treated to have an iridescent sheen. It was also called “Poor Man’s Tiffany”. Milk glass was white and opaque and pressed into different shapes, and came in several colors. Early American Press Cut was clear glass with a “Star of David” shape pressed into the glass. These also came in various colors. My mom proudly adorned her coffee table and dinner table with many of these gifts we bought for her from the Five and Dime. Mom always had a candy dish or tidbit plate sitting around, and a Milk glass bowl filled with beaded fruit decorated our dining room table for years. Now I have one on my own table. I guess it’s because it reminds me of mom's.
(You can click on this to make it larger)
Some Five and Dime stores had luncheonettes.  Ours didn’t get one until many years later when our little town built its first mall and the  Five and Dime moved into it. When my daughter was little I would take her there for a Patty Melt, or a grilled cheese sandwich and soup, or a root beer float. Good food and cheap! Ah …..the “Five and Dime.”  Those were simpler times and wonderful memories!


Being a good person is like being a pumpkin. God lifts you up, takes you in, and washes all the dirt off of you.

He opens you up, touches you deep inside and scoops out all of the yucky stuff -- including the seeds of doubt, hate, greed, etc.

Then He carves you a bright new smiling face and puts His light inside of you to shine for all the world to see.

~Author Unknown

This was passed on to me from another pumpkin. Now, it is your turn to pass it on to a pumpkin of your choice. I liked this enough to send it to all the pumpkins in my patch.

Have A Happy Fall!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Quote of the Day

"Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater.
If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.
If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.

She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of s##t."

~Author Unknown

Have a Great Day!

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Saturday Centus #25~ The Answer

I am linking to Jenny Matlock's Saturday Centus. It is a themed writing meme. You can use UP to 100 words (not including the prompt) to tell your story. You cannot use pictures to illustrate your story. It can be fact or fiction.

This week’s prompt is in bold: “This is the scariest story I've ever heard”

You can link back to some wonderful short stories here:

It has been a mystery since the beginning of time. Some believe in their answers by faith alone. Some refute the beliefs of others by demanding some kind of proof.

In a recent movie, a woman asked a man “What do you think happens to us after we die?”

“It’s lights out. The Plug is pulled. The great void” he replied.

“This is the scariest story I've ever heard” I said as I looked over to my husband, a lone tear rolling down his cheek. I leaned close and whispered into his ear, “Our souls are too beautiful to be disposable.”

I saw the relief in his eyes.

Friday Date Night

Well my hubby took me to the Fair up at the Catholic Church tonight. It’s an annual affair. We had to park a couple blocks away.
And we’re walking….we’re walking….

We talked about how we both went to this very same fair when we were younger, funny how things have changed since then. No way would I be caught dead on some of those rides now. I am more of a bumper car, Merry-Go-Round person myself. But it was nice to watch the kids scream and throw up.

And we’re walking….we’re walking….

I thought I might try my hand at shooting the card with a cork gun, but we stood for what seemed liked five minutes watching an elderly lady take aim before her elderly daughter grabbed the gun and took the shot. I guess she was tired of waiting on mom. Then the hubs pointed out to me that the sight was messed up and it didn’t matter what you aimed at because the cork was going to miss the target regardless.

And we’re walking….. we’re walking…

Next up was the “Ring the Bell Test of Strength.” You know, you drive a sledge hammer onto a scale and send the ringer up to the bell, if you’ve got the strength. I reminded my hubs of the last time he did that and won a stuffed animal for me. He promptly informed me that he wasn’t looking to pull something or have an accident in his shorts. Oh well, I am not the stuffed animal kind of person anyway.

And we’re walking…..we’re walking.

“Oh, those funnel cakes smell good” my hubs commented.

“Too greasy” I said.

“How about a Corn Dog then” I said

“Too expensive! By the time I buy one and a coke to wash it down, I’ve spent $6.00.” said hubs.

“Are we being cheap tonight?” I asked

“Yep.” He replied

“Hey!” I said to my hubs, “there’s a firefighter in a dunking tank. Let’s go take a shot. Three balls for a $1.00.” We stood there and watched for awhile, there must have been 12 kids in line. We decided to mosey on over to the Cake Walk.

Finally the hub’s says “You wanna play? Fifty cents a try!”

“Sure.” I said. I was hoping he’d want to play. I have always loved the Cake Walk. I once won a whole Coconut cake for my daughter when she was a little girl. Well, I felt stupid tonight. The object of this game was to sit in a seat with a number on it. Mine was number 7 and his was number 8. When the music starts, you start walking, when the music stops, you sit down. No rush. They weren’t going to pull a chair out of the circle to make every scramble for a chair. I guess there were too many elderly people. The host then pulls a number out of a big plastic pickle jar, and then announces the winner. Trouble is…the older people wouldn’t get a move on it and when the music stopped, I ended up in chair 21 and the hub’s was in chair 22. We didn’t even make it all the way around, due to the old people of course.

“And the winner is….number 7!” the host announced.

I got up to leave and the hubs asked “Are you quitting?”

“Yep” I said

Are we being cheap tonight? He asked

“Yep.” I replied. “Let’s go home. I’ve got box cakes in the pantry. I can make my own darn cake faster than I can win one playing this game!”

And we’re walking…and we’re walking … all the way back to the car. Some big date night, Bluuuueahhh (that’s me blowing a raspberry)!!!!

Maybe tomorrow night I can have a do over and he’ll take me to the movies. I want to see “Hereafter.” We’ve already seem “Secretariat.” It was an awesome movie. I’ll definitely watch that one again!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

“E” is for Epitaph

Alphabe~Thursday "E" is for Epitaph.
Today I am participating in Jenny Matlock’s Alphabe~Thursday. This Thursday is about the letter "E".

“E” is for Epitaph, those final last words that are read, by all those who visit you long after you’re dead.

Some words give a summary of a journey through life, while others take eternal jabs at their poor deceased wife.

A woman I am, a final say I must have, I won’t leave a wound, then use death as a salve.

Just plant me a tree at the foot of my grave,to provide a cool respite underneath of its shade.

No tombstone for me just a bench etched with wit,

lending aid to all who visit, by providing somewhere to sit.

 While contemplating my life, you may acknowledge with a nod, that I am truly dead and “The pea is not in the pod”

This bench upon my epitaph you sit is one last attempt at me expressing my wit.

No your visit was not wasted, so do not despair, I can still look down from heaven and see that you care.

Come sit on my bench and remember me, while you enjoy the shade cast down from my tree.

A tree filled with melody from the little birds that sing,

like me you’ll enjoy “The sweetness of doing nothing”

Some Famous and Not So Famous Epitaphs

George Bernard Shaw

(died 1950)

"Well, it will be a new experience anyway."

"I told you I was sick."

"Here Lies Good Old Fred, A Great Big Rock Fell On His Head"


Matthew Mudd

(unknown) from Massachusetts:
"Here lies Matthew Mudd,

Death did him no hurt;

When alive he was only Mudd,

But now he's only dirt."


"Blimey it's darker than I thought in here."


Here Lies My Longtime Wife. Now that she's gone, I'm lovin' life!


Here Lies My Wife, I Bid Her Goodbye. She Rests in Peace, and Now So Do I.


“La dolcezza di non fare nulla” -The Sweetness of Doing Nothing.


Mel Blanc (by himself)1908 - 1989

"That's all, folks!"


Saturday, October 16, 2010

Saturday Centus #24~The Haunting

I am linking to Jenny Matlock's Saturday Centus. It is a themed writing meme. You can use UP to 100 words (not including the prompt) to tell your story. You cannot use pictures to illustrate your story. It can be fact or fiction.

This week’s prompt is:  “Trick or Treat!” They shouted as the door opened.

Lucy curled on her side as the nurse straightened her blankets.

“I wish the dear lord would come and take me home. Got nobody left to care. What’s the use?” Lucy grumbled.

A faint knock came from the partially closed door.

“Oh now Miss Lucy, you have plenty of friends here. Why you have visitors now!”

Lucy perked up, eyes sparkling with unshed tears.

“Trick or Treat!” They shouted as the door opened. In popped a little Fairy and Batman.

"Who are you?" Lucy asked

“I’m your Fairy great granddaughter” the small child boasted.

“And I’m Batman. I’m here to rescue you, because she’s too little to fly.”


Holidays always seem to keep us busy. I hope everyone will take the time to remember our elderly shut-ins. You will be one some day. You wouldn't want to be forgotten would you?~Ames

Saturday, October 9, 2010

My Knight in Shining Armor

My Knight in Shining Armor

I am so grateful to be married, and not single and struggling to meet someone. I call it the “selection process.” Here I am waiting on a park bench, under a tree, on a street corner in the Village, where I wait patiently for my husband to show up and take me to dinner. He is riding on his motorcycle to meet me, coming here with a group of our friends. All of us are going to eat Pizza together at a nice little Pizza Parlor in the Village.

As I sit here, watching people go by, listening to someone singing, her voice wafting through the air, entertaining myself while playing with my Droid, two men sit down beside me. One man is around my age, and the other man is considerably younger. They strike up a conversation with me. Before long, I realize they are a couple and actually not hitting on me. I relax. Not that I get hit on all the time. I am just self conscious as I didn’t have my wedding ring on, a result of my swollen fingers. You know, water retention and middle age. Joy.

Anyway, it just felt awkward trying to converse with men that approach you out of nowhere. I am rusty at the "selection process" and I am happily married now. I have forgotten how to strike up conversations with strangers. It must be coming back though. They invited me to go upstairs with them to the Pub for a drink, to listen to their friend sing, who was entertaining in the Pub that evening. I declined.

“I’m waiting for someone” I said. They get up; reinforce the invitation, before leaving to go hear their friend sing.

The breeze is blowing, it’s starting to get a little chilly, I’m still playing with my Droid, and I look around and see a young woman walking down the sloping sidewalk towards me. The first thing I notice is that she is barefooted. She is wearing one of those crinkly skirts, a belly dancing coin belt, and she is lighting up a cigarette. She sits down next to me. I am guessing she was the one I heard singing earlier. She looks flamboyant, like one of those new age artistic singers. Or am I profiling. I watch too much Criminal Minds.

“You look mad” she said.

“Hummmm” I’m thinking to myself, “what a strange way to strike up a conversation with a stranger.”

“I’m not mad; I’m just waiting for someone.” I said.

Then she starts to tell me she is new to the area, and loves it here and blah, blah, blah,…. blah, blah, blah is all I hear because when I look up I see my knight in shining armor walking towards me. And he is holding my sweater. Look at him, he is so handsome! I love him! I'm happy! I am so glad to be out of selection process!

Saturday Centus #23~ Doing Dishes

I am linking to Jenny Matlock's Saturday Centus. It is a themed writing meme. You can use UP to 100 words (not including the prompt) to tell your story. You cannot use pictures to illustrate your story. It can be fact or fiction.

This week’s prompt is: "If I had a hammer".....

My father went to garage sales a lot in his elderly years. Mom being kind hearted, never said much to discourage him. I think she enjoyed her alone time while he was gone. While visiting one Saturday morning, I saw mom break a dirty plate with a hammer, and smile as she dropped the pieces into the waste bin.

“Why are you doing this?” I asked.

“Don’t worry; your father can buy more” she replied.

Now as I stand here over my kitchen sink washing dishes, looking over at my husband relaxing comfortably in front of the TV, I wish "If I had a hammer"……

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Alphabe~Thursday "C" is for Crane

Today I am participating in Jenny Matlock’s Alphabe~Thursday. This Thursday is about the letter "C".

Sandhill cranes are such a lovely creatures. I think one of the things that make them so beautiful to me is that they mate for life. They come to our yard as a family to forage in our grass and they take turns feeding their young, called colts. Their colts learn to fly by dancing and running along side their parents. It is so funny to watch, and momma is never too far away.

Sandhill cranes make the loudest trill I have heard coming from a bird. They walk through our neighborhood and actually stop traffic. One time my husband and I were were driving south and came upon a bunch if police cars blocking one lane of the boulevard. Someone had hit a baby colt with their car and the momma and daddy Sandhill cranes were standing over it making the most mournful screech I have ever heard. It was so sad. My husband and I couldn't bare to look at such a sorrowful scene, so we just cried in silence. We do that a lot now. Especially where animals are concerned. These birds are highly revered and protected so much that killing one can cause a public outrage. Whether or not it was done on purpose or by accident. And it always makes the paper, as though one were writing out an obituary.

The view from our porch is very entertaining at times, all hours of the day and night. Sometimes it's yellow finches and red Cardinals fighting for the special food I put in the bird feeder. Such a pretty sight. And sometimes a big beautiful Osprey or Hawk will stop by and sit on a branch in the tree, eyeballing the ground for something interesting to eat. Lately it's been a couple of turtles sunning on the bank of the little pond.

In the evening before the sun goes down, a family of racoon's might truck on by. The little ones stopping to investigate and play. One night I saw a shadowy figure in the yard. I flipped on the light to investigate and saw the ugliest Opossum I've ever seen. And of course there are the occasional Armadillos too. Pesky little buggers they are, digging burrows in my flower garden. Why they can ruin a foundation or an in ground pool if not taken care of. Between us, and our neighbors on either side, we paid $300.00 to have one caught, removed and released back in the wild somewhere else. He was a sneaky little bugger. It took three weeks to catch him.

Sometimes it's not only difficult to catch pesky critters, but dangerous too. I once saw an alligator thrashing about in the pond and warned my neighbor to keep her little white fluffy Bichon Frise dogs inside. Gators love little dogs. The Wildlife Officer and Game Trapper took out a 6'2 inch gator that day. And wouldn't you know, we've had the occasional snake or two as well. Yuck! I usually let the good ones keep on slithering by. But it's the bad one's that give me the heebie jeebies!

I'm sitting here on my porch this morning. The weather is lovely, my chimes are tinkling in the wind, and I am enjoying my morning coffee with a piping hot bowl of oatmeal made from steel cut oats, topped with brown sugar, butter and raisins. Yum! I love sitting out here. We haven't been able to use our porch the entire summer as it has been too hot and humid.

So, here I sit, unocular and camera by my side. Anxious to seize the moment. There's always Heron's, Egrets, Falcon's, Ibises, Storks and Cranes to be seen. This morning my visitor was a beautiful Great White Egret. They are so funny to watch. They stand perfectly still while stalking their prey, and wobble and sway when they mosey away. Like an old drunk. I can't ever imagine these beautiful birds being killed, so that their plumage could be used to decorate hats. I would  rather appreciate their beauty from a distance in the wild, than from on top of someone's head.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Saturday Centus # 22 ~ The Legacy

I am linking to Jenny Matlock's Saturday Centus. It is a themed writing meme. You can use UP to 100 words (not including the prompt) to tell your story. You cannot use pictures to illustrate your story. It can be fact or fiction.

This week’s prompt is the picture shown below.

The Legacy

Maw? You ever get tired of pumpkins? I’m sick of pumpkins. Always pumpkins! Can’t paw ever plant anything else?

Hush now girl! Don’t let yer paw hear ya. He’s bone tired come end of day. Works all year just to pay our keep and set back a little to make it through the winter. Says you make the best pumpkin pies around, says it’s your legacy. Says every man, woman, and child will eat pumpkin pies this time of year. Ours bring the highest price. Now go on Libby girl, we still got all those pumpkins to put up.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Fire Prevention Week is October 3-9th

It’s time to change your batteries!!

Fire Prevention Week is October 3-9th

This year’s theme is: Smoke Alarms, a sound you can live with!


Be Safe!

You can replace a house, but you can't replace a loved one!

October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month

I've had mine....

Have you had yours?????

I'm talking about a Mammogram
~Perform self breast exams
~Follow up with your doctor
~Get a Mammogram

Did you know that Men can get breast cancer too?

Get the Facts Now!